The deck continues to be stacked in favor of a big move to the land of the midnight sun..........

The World Economic Forum's Global Gender Gap Report 2006 named Sweden as the world's most progressive country when it comes to equality of the sexes, followed by Norway, Finland and Iceland.


What am I waiting for?

We crossed the line
Who pushed who over?
It doesnt matter to you
It matters to me

We're cut adrift
But still floating
Im only hanging on
To watch you go down...my love

I disappeared in you
You disappeared from me
I gave you everything you ever wanted
It wasnt what you wanted

The men who love you, you hate the most
They pass through you like a ghost
They look for you but your spirit is in the air
Baby...youre nowhere

You say in love there are no rules
Sweetheart
Youre so cruel

Desparation is a tender trap
It gets you every time
You put your lips to her lips
To stop the lies

Her skin is pale like gods only dove
Screams like an angel for your love
Then she makes you watch her from above
And you need her like a drug

You say in love there are no rules
Sweetheart
Youre so cruel

She wears my love
Like a see-through dress
Her lips say one thing
Her movements something else
Oh love
Like a screaming flower
Love
Dying every hour

And you dont know if its fear or desire
Danger of a drug that takes you higher?
Head of heaven
Fingers in the mire

Her heart is racing... you cant keep up
The night is bleeding like a cut
Between the horses of love and lust
You are trampled underfoot

You say in love there are no rules
Sweetheart
Youre so cruel

To stay with you Id be a fool
Sweetheart
Youre so cruel.


Say what you will.....achtung baby is a fucking masterpiece. I can't even begin to pick a favorite song on this album. This one is the one that's playing right now and so I picked these lyrics but it could just as easily be any of them.
I stumbled upon a video compilation from this album and tour at the goodwill for $1.99 today. It was certainly a dollar ninety nine well spent.
This is probably the U-2 album I would pick for my desert island discs---I was super down with the political U-2 from the 80s, but this more personal statement is the one that sticks with me.
What's your favorite?

Wow, the 90s were not completely a musical wasteland, you know? I am listening right now to "Low" by Cracker. That is a good tune. Also, that song by the toadies about the vampire...I'm always on the lookout for that one. I remember these songs from when I was the assistant manager at the carlow bookstore and we would play WXXP on the boombox ontop of the milkcrate in the corner of the clothing section. I remember one time I had to leap across the room to turn it off because I had a store full of nuns and howard stern was about to say something REALLY offensive. Those were the days!
So, the show! It was a good one. I got myself dolled up and bought a pack of salem ultra light 100s and headed down to the pub. I started to drink beck's dark immediately. Chatted with some friends and started to get excited. And then I started to get a little irritated that it was 10:45 and my bandmates were not there yet. And then, I got a call from Anita saying that they had called a cab an hour before. Ugh. I talked to some people and got a few volunteers to go and pick them up, but I didn't want to ask someone to do that since the first band had already started. But I went outside and called colin and he said that they were on their way, even though he couldn't actually hear me. He just shouted into the phone.
Moments later they pulled up in the car...apparently it had arrived just in the nick of time. Sigh. We loaded in and I got another beer and set about enjoying the show.
Stefano Men---wow! Rick bach's songs are so great! Sam's drumming is the perfect mix of wacky and controlled...it's hard to describe, but I always feel like he is holding things together despite the fact that he is basically self destructing behind the kit. Love it. Rick bach sang a song about all the gods getting together and having a drunken barbecue with lap dances and bumper cars. Ha!
I had a few more beers...I don't know how many. Then we set up. Well, we started to set up and I discovered that my timbale stand was shot in a whole different way from how it had been shot at the last show. Colin my superhero went outside and came back in with three giant sandbags which he plunked down on the legs. Brilliant. The boys hit the whiskey and then we were off! We started out with all new songs, and people seemed to dig them. There was a lot of standing and nodding, which I took to be a sign of appreciation. We really aren't a dancey band, dude. It's about the lyrics. We did a fine job of pulling off even the songs I had only heard once. It all went by in a flash for me, really. Our final number was a tribute to the burned down house.
Jumped off the stage and collected compliments...my favorite thing in the world is when a girl comes up to me and tells me that watching me makes her want to play the drums. That means I've done my job!
The Skinks set up and launched into their happy swirly set. At some point Ben showed up next to me in a big tan overcoat and a yellow toque that says YIPPEE! in red all around the middle. So cute! Will dedicated the T Rex-y song to me. Yay! I was tuckered out so sat for their set, but lots of people were bouncing and dancing and having a drunkenly good time. Saturday night baby.
At some point, my superhero came up to me and said something about owing me a debt he hopes I will continue to let him pay. I am not sure what that meant, although I think I know. It's nice to play music with people I feel very connected to. To whom I feel very connected. I was having more and more fantasies of getting a warehouse to bang on things and set things on fire. Someday, my friends. Heliofucker.
There was some confusion at the end of the night but eventually I was taken home. I gave the boys the last of the compari and sent them off to the afterparty. I went to the afterparty in my bed.
Brunch was pretty busy, but not overwhelming. I was tuckered out and that made it hard. But we did it, and I went home intending to get in the bed again. Instead, I got on the computer and ended up in the sickthings chatroom with some of my old friends and a really depressed chick from Sweden. It was mostly fun, but I just don't understand people who hijack conversation so they can talk about their problems. Plus---how can you be depressed when you live in sweden? seriously. I would be so psyched all the time.
I am pretty psyched that I am going to have wednesday morning off so I can attend the wednesday morning global roxie radio party. I've missed it!

German Style Sweet and Sour Brussels Sprouts

I am finishing off the last of my thanksgiving leftovers, and these brussels sprouts are just so dang good that I have to share the recipe with you! I am so excited that I still have a few sprouts left from Pirate Pete so I can make it again when rebby comes back from Ohio.

Here is the original recipe from stephen cooks, along with my adjustments:

Roasted Brussels Sprouts with Bacon, Apples and Onions, with Balsamic Glaze

1 lb Brussels sprouts
6 slices bacon
1 T mustard seeds (I used powdered coleman mustard--see below)
1 medium onion, peeled, cut in crescents (I used two, but they were smallish)
1 tart crisp apple (I used two jona golds from pirate pete)
3 T brown sugar
2 T balsamic vinegar (I used malt vinegar; had I had cider vinegar I would have used that)
1/2 C dry white wine (I substituted apple cider)
1 T Dijon mustard (I left this out and just upped the powdered mustard)
olive oil
salt, hot sauce to taste (I didn't use any hot sauce--that's weird to me)

Trim the root ends of the sprouts, remove dried outer leaves and cut each sprout in half. Toss with a tablespoonful or so of olive oil and roast uncovered in a preheated 325º oven about 25 minutes, stirring occasionally. Remove when the sprouts are cooked through and starting to brown and char along the edges.

Meanwhile, in a pan large enough to contain all the ingredients, sauté the bacon until just starting to crisp at the edges and remove to drain on paper towel. Pour all but 1 T of the bacon grease from the pan and discard. Add the mustard seeds (if you use the powdered mustard, wait until you add the brown sugar) to the pan and stir over medium high heat until they start to pop. Add the onions and apples, lower the heat to medium and sauté , stirring occasionally, until starting to turn soft, about 5 or 6 minutes. Stir in the sugar, wine (or cider) and vinegar, raise the heat to medium high and cook, stirring, several minutes until the liquid is reduced to a syrup. Remove from heat and stir in the mustard.


Chop the bacon and add it to the pan, then add the sprouts to the pan and stir and toss to combine. Correct seasoning. May be served immediately or at room temperature.

Note: to make ahead, slightly undercook the sprouts so they will finish cooking when reheated.

This is my new favorite way to cook brussels sprouts. Just roasting them to start with is amazing...I don't roast enough vegetables at home.

Thanksgiving....a delicious and low key day. I was (and still am, a little bit) fighting nostalgia for my 4day drunken freak fests of yore, but I have to say that a gourmet meal in the company of beautiful funny women was good for the soul. The meal included a moist and attractive tea brined turkey, lime roasted yams, corn pudding with smoked gouda, truffle and garlic smashed potatoes, creamed spinach, traditional stuffing, cranberry fig chutney, ginger cranberry relish, and cranberry sauce out of a can (we had it all ways, baby!) brussels sprouts with apples onions and bacon and a mustard brown sugar glaze(my new favorite thing to put in my mouth, for reals) crescent rolls in the traditional crescent shape(as opposed to roadkill, or a giant baby) date cake with sticky toffee topping and sweet potato ice cream, and butternut squash pie. I think that's everything. Cranberry mojitos, pete's winter ale, and dusky australian shiraz also. Lots of laughter and good smells and camaraderie and watching of the top 100 songs of the 80s (Livin on a Prayer? Get real!) I walked home around 11 pm and the cool evening air refreshed my head. I ended up staying up late into the night working on my new wave cabaret historical reference.
I did NOT, however, watch Urgh a Music War. I feel like I should sit down with it today while I do laundry so the Thanksgiving weekend is not a total sacrilege.
Yesterday I went into the restaurant to receive the frankferd order(ha! they were 45 minutes later than the latest estimate, so I sat there and smoked cigarettes for a long time) and learned the terrible news that the houses of friends and acquaintances had burned to the ground early in the morning. The emotional rollercoaster I went on in those 20 minutes, coupled with the intense effort of throwing together scrambled tofu roasted vegetables, caramelized onions, onion gravy and crumbled soysage in under 20 minutes, sent me straight to bed when I got home about two hours later than I had anticipated. No laundry for me. Instead I had a great nap and then headed over to J&W's place for wine and leftovers! And great conversation. I love to go to their house and sit at the table with a bottle of wine and good tunes on the stereo. I swear I am going to have them over for brussels sprouts before the year is out! Their leftovers were awesome (I got some green bean casserole which I was missing from my turkey day, and both pumpkin AND pecan pie!) and I got a new red hat out of the deal too! Thanks again guys.
Anita and Colin picked me up from there and we came to my place for a low fi practice. I was so full of mixed emotions about it, but in the end I realize it was just what I needed. Grounding. There are new songs which we are going to fearlessly trot out tonight because we live on the edge. Ha!
Today I am working saturday morning breakfast and I think it is going to be a killer. Then I will come home and do the laundry I neglected yesterday and finish off the leftovers and try to get my place back in order, a little bit. And then get dolled up for the 31st Street Pub!

Woohoo!
It's 5:30 the night before thanksgiving and I am getting totally trashed on a ritter sport bar with rum, raisins and hazelnuts. Seriously, this thing is potent! To be fair, I am also sipping on a little glass of mateus, but for the most part it's the candy that has me feeling all woozy. It's a good feeling. I've got some rock and roll blasting (it's something on the rock home of stockholm but I'm not sure what) and I'm gearing up to start doing some pre holiday cooking. Tonight I plan to make a butternut squash pie, get started on the stuffing, and make some delicious sounding brussels sprouts with bacon, apple, onions and balsamic glaze. Oh yes.
OK, it was the supersuckers. Now the cute little blonde swede is playing Closer. Only it's not live---this is the third go round of the day's programs. I caught the tail end of the second go round of Roxie's show and...eep..he dedicated Wolfmother to me! I'm sure my chatroom buddies put him up to it, but still...sigh. You better believe I'll be listening to the third go round again....
It's been a rollercoaster of days since I last wrote. Monday I took rebby with me for the final farmer's market of the season. Pirate Pete was not looking especially pirate-ish because it was cold and he was all bundled up, but he was still cute. I bought a bunch of brussels sprouts and onions from him and got a bonus butternut squash. Rebby stocked up on a bunch of stuff and then we headed over to the Whole Foods to get a roast for dinner. I left her outside with the parcels while I braved it....she is just not a big fan of grocery stores in general, and certainly not the madhouse of Whole Foods the week of thanksgiving. I got a nice roast and some veggies to go with it, and then we headed home to cook it up. It was delish, although it took longer than we wanted so we ended up throwing it in the oven instead of using the crock pot. Still good!
Yesterday I went into work only to find out that Jilly thought she was working for me...d'oh! I ended up staying so she could do some things at home to get ready for the big day. Did a bunch of prep and had a busyish breakfast and then made some ratatouille for a supper special. And got out EARLY! Woohoo. Mostly did dishes and internet yesterday, and then watched Pink Narcissus. Wow, that was a mindblower. It's gorgeous and very surreal. I definitely want to watch it again before I send it back. There is an amazing scene where the boy is being a male harem dancer and his weiner is bobbing around tangled in scarves and pearls....it teeters on the edge of being funny (because bobbing weiners are ALWAYS funny) but it really is beautifully shot.
This morning was another super busy and roxie-less breakfast for me. It got real slow after breakfast so I ended up leaving early again and headed to the grocery store for some last minute cranberries (oh snap! I gotta make the cranberry relish too!) and crescent rolls and gjetost. I've gotten myself addicted to the Norwegian ski queen again. Pass the finncrisp!

Out on my street, HOLLYWOOD MAGIC! is happening. Earlier I got to watch out my window as cameras and gels and lights were unloaded from giant trucks. I am yet to see any ACTION, but these things take a thousand hours from what I'm told. Still, it's kind of exciting. I wish it was Ian McKellen instead of Dennis Quaid who was going to be on my street, because then I could totally take advantage of my position. But I really could not care less about Dennis Quaid, or even SJP, for that matter. Ho hum.
I had a weekend packed with the good and the bad. Yesterday was my LUPEC party, and it was real nice. It was sort of an ordeal to cook dinner and make cocktails for 6 people in my tiny kitchen, but I managed. What I did NOT manage to do is buy more dish soap when I was at the store yesterday, so most of the dishes are still piled on the stove. Dangit. The house is super clean now which I hope to take advantage of in a big way by not filling it up with crap. We'll see. The refrigerator is full of bottles of mixers which should come in handy for thanksgiving day. Hopefully I can foist the Ouzo off on someone, though I have to say that the Hairy Armpit was my favorite drink of the night. Ouzo and unsweetened grapefruit juice...whaddya know? While getting ready for the party I was listening to Sweet Honey In the Rock and it really put me into a nice mood. I had a lot of other music planned for the evening but my living room is so small that someone was sitting in front of the stereo and I didn't want to make her move. So the end of the night was sort of silent.
I didn't get to do all the grand things I had planned for the party because Saturday morning I woke up with MIGRAINE! Gross! I felt super ick when I woke up, and it was that kind of ick where I thought if I take pills for the headache I will DEFINITELY vomit. So I didn't take any pills, but vomited anyway. Ew. It was definitely hormonally based, and I am not at all psyched about the possibility that I am going to have to deal with that on a monthly basis again. So I am once again going to commit myself to a healthy lifestyle. We'll see how long that lasts. Instead of doing a lot of shopping and prepping, I crashed on rebby's couch and watched Hedwig. Around 5ish I felt like I could maybe eat and we went to Dunnings where I had a steak salad. It was good, but I still felt weird and spacy. We did stop at the co-op so I could get some veg broth powder and soy whip! for the quizzle, and then came home and watched The Gospel According to St Matthew by Passolini. It was pretty intense, but weirdly overdubbed. I really like the look of his films....the two I've seen anyway are really "blown out" looking. I'm looking forward to seeing more.
Friday I worked the dinner shift and got all stressed out. I think I am just out of practice on the dinner shift, but it always makes me cranky. I guess I feel like everything is hurtling off the cliff at that point and if I don't solve all the problems everything will fall apart. It's not really like that, but I somehow give myself an inflated sense of importance. I need to learn to just relax and do what I can.
Finally talked on the phone to my sissy last night....she has an exciting possibility before her that I am crossing my fingers and toes will happen. I think the fact that Will and Grace was on the TV when she was telling me about it is a good omen. Let's hope!
OK, I've got a lot of slip tallies to catch up on, and I have to figure out when we can get a tempeh delivery. And Sebastian is crooning to me. I shouldn't ignore him.

Yesterday tragedy struck! I realized around 7am that I only had $5.57 in my checking account, and I would need $4.95 to get my wireless internet pass for the day at the restaurant so I could join the roxie global rock party. So I hoofed down to the mac machine to deposit some cash, then hoofed to the storm. The barista was late, so I had to run around and turn on the lights and make coffee instead of settling in to get my internet set up. She got there a few minutes later and I ran into the kitchen and pulled out my computer and.....NO CONNECTION. Telerama was not to be found. There was some other network that claimed I was connected, but I couldn't actually access anything. THE HORROR! I kept trying for about 20 minutes and finally had to give up. No roxie party for me. So sad! I was pretty busy at breakfast, and there was plenty of stuff to do to take up my time, but....still. And then I had to wash dishes too! Insult to injury. But I did make some really damn yummy tofu chicken and dumplings, and a very popular pumpkin curry soup.
When I got home I sped to hook my computer back up to my pathetic dialup, which felt like a godsend at that point. I connected to the rock home of stockholm but had JUST missed the repeat of the Roxie show! Waaaah. AND THEN....I got a myspace message from one of my roxie friends that he had finally played the hanoi rocks I have been patiently requesting since his first show. WHAT!?!? tragic, I tell you.
I had some things to do at the desk, so I ordered a pizza and made the commitment to listen to the next go round, which ended up starting at 8pm. But I finally heard it! Malibu Beach Nightmare!!!
I have to say that it might have been a good thing after all that I wasn't listening at the restaurant, because he played "The Freshmen" by the Verve Pipe which always gets me a little weepy, and then....."This Is The Sea" by the Waterboys. That song takes me right past a little weepy into practically hysterical with the melodramatic tears. I swear I haven't heard it or thought of it in about 10 years, but the very first note sent me into such a state that had I been in the kitchen I am sure I would have been on the floor mat in a puddle. The album came out the year I graduated from high school, and I think I must have gotten it in one of those Columbia Music House deals. I don't have it anymore, and that is a tragedy all it's own. If you are wondering what to get me for Christmas or my birthday, this might be a good bet. I may of course order it for myself before then because I am sort of obsessive like that. I know I have "The Pan Within" on some gothy mixtape I made for myself back then...maybe that will hold me over for a while. Maybe some brave soul will do a cover of a Waterboys song for the New Wave Cabaret.....
SO yeah, it's official--Feb 3rd at the Pub. I already have at least 5 confirmed acts. I already have a promise of bauhaus, love and rockets, inxs, depeche mode, and duran duran. What I don't have yet is any idea what I am going to wear. I should get on that. My sister is hoping to come and do a bellydance performance to an Adam Ant song. Have I mentioned how much I love her?
Speaking of stuff I love....I really fucking love Sweden. Not only can you use bad curse words on the radio (I swear I blushed when I heard Roxie drop the f bomb in the middle of the night last night!) but also, they have a government office dedicated to fighting discrimination based on sexual orientation. I am not sure what the Swedish name is, but the acronym is HomO. Isn't that the cutest thing ever? The current HomO looks like such a nice fellow too. Between the great radio, and the best military issue long underwear and wool socks ever, and the socialized medicine and human rights programs, and the HomO, and the salty licorice fish, and of course,um, that guy.....what's his name again?....ha! I don't know why I haven't moved there yet. Maybe it's the 6 months of darkness...but hey, I'm a gothy girl! I could so get used to it. If the democrats don't manage to turn this country around in the next two years, I am going to consider it. I wonder if there are vegans in Sweden? Why, yes, there are. What do you know?

New favorite thing to do:
play spider solitaire over and over while the Skid Row Cd plays on repeat.

I swear, I have listened to it enough now that I love it completely non-ironically. Sebastian really does have some pipes on him, and some of these Rachel Bolan grooves are super---groovy. I know I should be ashamed, but I think I might be ready to proclaim my love for Skid Row proudly.
Getting ready to start digging through boxes for some envelopes for LUPEC party invitations. I found the perfect envelopes when I was digging through boxes a few weeks ago but like a TARD I put them back into the melee. I'm two days behind schedule on getting the invites out, but hopefully everyone will find them worth the wait. I am pretty proud of myself.

Yesterday I stayed in for most of the day...doing dishes, slip tallies, watching Martha Stewart and Ellen load a dishwasher(bizarre!) and playing spider solitaire and listening to Skid Row. I finally got out of the house at about 4pm to get down to the farmer's market. My secret farmboy pirate lover did not help me, as he was busy dealing with giant bags of potatoes and bushels of kale and collards. However, he did nod and smile when I passed him by. Swoon. Then I got to watch him carry 100 pounds of potatoes on his shoulders (50 pounds each!) across the parking lot for a couple of old ladies. Sweet. Then I got on the 64A and took myself to the movies!
I decided to continue my Maggie Gyllenhaal Film Festival by going to see Stranger Than Fiction. I LOVED it! It's real weird. Some of my all time favorite actors (Dustin Hoffman, Emma Thompson, and of course Maggie as an anarchist baker!!!) and even Will Ferrel didn't annoy me that much. He did alright as a straight man. I think you can probably wait till it comes out on DVD to see it...I'm sure it won't be long. Despite the "star power", I think it's going to be a real sleeper of a movie. But I highly recommend it to everyone I know. There was only me and one couple in the theater...we all three laughed out loud a lot, and oddly it was often at different moments. I like going to the movies by myself....I had forgotten.

WOW.

I just watched Donnie Darko for the first time. I bought the director's cut 2 DVD set at the grocery store last week because I had never seen it and lots of people I know have expressed outrage that I've never seen it.
My mind is totally blown. What a good movie. I can't wait to watch it again with the director's commentary. I don't always love director's commentaries, but I think I really want to get further into the head of Richard Kelly.
I'm still a little stunned. I can't believe I've missed out on it all this time!

So, night one of the giant rock and roll weekend exceeded all expectations. We started out going to the Sharp Edge for late afternoon refreshments, only to find to our great delight that they also now have MAGIC #9 on tap!!! That makes Oakland Cafe(where I would never really venture without a very good reason), Harris Grill(which I love to support, although their service tends to be hit or miss), Brillobox(where I find myself often enough, but I doubt I would go there solely for beers) and Sharp Edge, where we tend to go pretty damn regularly anyway. It's the dawn of a new era in Pittsburgh, in addition to Pennsylvania and the whole freakin country! Woohoo!
So yeah, Magic Hats and burgers were had. I really enjoyed the barbecue burger although it was a little overcooked. Eh. I indulged in the belgian frites also and they were delicious.
We followed our meal and beers with a disco nap, then got ourselves stoked to go out by cranking some Judas Priest. Went to the QS for coffee and to catch our poet in the kitchen, Greg, do his spoken word set for sound kitchen. He was awesome. We hung around there a while and then it got too hot, so we left for the pub.
Arrived around 9:45 and got some beers and a table. I talked to Joel about booking the pub for the upcoming new wave cabaret....official announcement coming VERY SOON! He said he is really looking forward to more rickety things in 2007---and after that night, I feel like it might be a good idea. There was a lot of talk amongst the assembled about how we are all really 10 years older and not liable to go out even once a week to a rock show anymore(except for some of the more hardcore folks) but once a month I'll bet we could swing it. I do love being at the pub for some rock.
I hung out with J a bunch like old times, and it was great to see all the brains boys(and ben's brother, who I haven't seen for years!) It was a good crowd, and much beer and tequila was consumed. The Skinks started off the night just before I got too antsy. This was the third or fourth incarnation of the Skinks I have seen, and I gotta say it's definitely my favorite. There was some beatlesque and some glammy stuff going on, and a nice solid back beat. Someone(I can't remember if it was Mike Bonello or Tommy Amoeba or maybe even someone totally different) said it sounded like a return to the old viragos days, and I could definitely hear that too. I loved it!
Next up was the brains...oh my. I went ahead and just let myself get all crazy, though not as crazy as the wild flailers like rebby and mueller who showed up next to me at precisely the right moment. They really had the joint jumpin. I love to watch each and every one of them...they are all very entertaining rockers. Logan brought a new tune and it was terrific....good things are on the horizon for the Human Brains. I couldn't be happier to have one of my favorite bands back in rotation! I had to take a seat after that madness, and had some nice conversations at the bar with various old heads from back in the day. I also drank a bunch of coronas...I couldn't tell you how many. I don't think I ever got all that drunken, though. I did get pretty worn out by the time the Faces took the stage...I watched most of their set from a comfy table in the back. Except for "Cleopatra"--that one got me out of my seat. I was really impressed with their set...I've seen a lot of barely controlled chaos from the Faces, but this was really about the music, and it sounded REAL GOOD. A lot funkier than I would give the Faces credit for. I was suitably blown away. It took a while for us to extricate ourselves at the end of the night....lots of drunken people were congregated around the door and in chatty moods. Eventually we got out, got home safely, and into bed. Ah.
I woke up early despite my behaviors and made coffee and started laundry. I'm hopeless. Rebby had to go in to work at 11am to show some dailies to the people who are making a movie in town, but when she was done we got on the road to McKnight for some serious shopping.
We started at the pancake house where I had the swedish pancakes (ha!) with lingonberries. It was delicious. We hit Gabriel bros where I ended up getting some jeans that don't quite fit right, and a pair of lace footless tights that are awesome. Also a long underwear shirt and a plain lightweight black t shirt, which is now my new favorite thing. From there we went over to the mall that time forgot where I got some more tights at marshalls and some good cheap bras at the value city. I also picked up a few kitchen implements and a bag of kona coffee, because it was there. Then we cruised on down to the Exchange, where the fun started in earnest. After feeling defeated three times, I finally found the Skid Row Cd with 18 and Life and I Remember You and Youth Gone Wild on it. Additionally, I got one called B-Sides Ourselves, which has them covering "Psychotherapy", "Delivering the Goods", "C'Mon and Love Me" and "Little Wing", in addition to some Rush song with which I am unfamiliar. It's all really funny. I also got the Judas Priest CD Sin after Sin which has several slow burning screamy ballads. And a bizarre Cd which is goth/industrial remixes of Sweet songs. I'm not sure how I feel about that one yet. Then I found a VHS copy of the first XMen movie for a dollar! Woohoo! Rebby went nuts with the Judas Priest, but she claims most of them will be xmas gifts. Yeah right.
We got home from the wild commerce and I made a delicious pasta dinner of whole wheat spaghetti with fresh tomato, spinach, onion, garlic, and cajun sausage. Yummers. By the time we were done eating and listening to our new purchases (the Skid Row was played MANY, MANY times over, believe me--and it's playing again right now!) it was time to get ready to go out again. I decided to wear my new fishnets and black t shirt with this awesome orange paisley skirt I got thrifting quite a while ago and have never worn out of the house. I love it. I put on my Alice Cooper button and my Black Phoenix Alchemy Labs LUST oil and we headed out the door.
Got there sort of early-ish but there were already plenty of people in the house. Joel gave me some shit for not calling him, but we did manage to officially book the new wave cabaret date. I'm so excited! He told me that the last one we did there is still the record attendance of any show at the pub. WOW!
I switched to straub for night two of pubbing...and I scored a free pack from the camel girl. Hallelujah! We sat at a table across from the Genders but I don't know if it was being kinda tired or some weird social anxiety, but I never said anything to them. I don't know why this keeps happening to me....it was the same way with the seven shot screamers. Back in the day I had no problem chatting up rock stars...I don't know if it's my relative lack of rocking these days or what. Anyway, it was nice to watch people treat them like super big shots with photos and autographs. They were really sweet to everyone. Such nice guys!
It took a thousand hours for the cheats to take the stage....turns out that the bass player was late. He rolled in looking like a super rock star and went right on stage, then they finally began. I really heart this band...real old skool punk with a glam rock edge. Todd the singer is hilarious and totally over the top. He did this thing he used to do with his old band Silver Tongued Devil where he set the cymbals ablaze and breathed fire. It was AWESOME! People went nuts. The Genders loved them.
Next up was the new Science Fiction Idols line up. Bobby was so nervous, but it went off without an obvious hitch. They sounded great, everyone seemed to be having a good time on stage, and the crowd went absolutely WILD! It was nice to see so much love and support. Oddly enough, the second song in their set was "C'mon and Love Me"!!!! I couldn't believe it. It's like my theme song this weekend. They also did a rockin cover of "Neighbors" by the Stones off of Tattoo You, one of my favorites from back in the day. Also lots of hits from Spooky Sugar and the first Sci Fi Idols Cd, which was nice to hear. We boogied down all the way.
Then the Genders....wow. I didn't think they could possibly be MORE rockin than when I saw them at Garfield Artworks last year, but...yep. Amir is one of the sexiest frontmen alive, and they have a second guitarista now too which adds so much. Not just eye candy, although I must say that he is a tasty morsel of axeman. They did lots of rock posturing and the small crowd who stuck around(People are CRAZY for leaving before they played!) got way into it. They ended their set with a cover of "If You Want Blood" by AC/DC and Todd jumped on stage to take the vocals. It was a beautiful mess. We cut out of there right after they were done and got the new Genders album on the way out....it's incredible. Their lyrics really give me hope for the power of rock and roll to bring people together.
We got home and fell into bed again....I still woke up at 8am despite being exhausted. That's how it goes. I made some coffee and watched some of an episode of Now I've seen before (about the GM plants closing) and then got ready for the real political commentary. I made waffles during To The Contrary, where there was an actual real live black female republican on the panel. I don't get it. We are our waffles during the McGlaughlin Group...Lawrence was there, as he said "just to gloat." God I love that man. Next up was Religion and Ethics Newsweekly with a bizarre story of some guy who "owns" all this land around a sacred native american mountain and he wants to build a giant biker bar and "tepee camping village" on it. He can't understand why the native americans have a problem with it. Of course, they hold a treaty which says the land belongs to them, but somehow these treaties don't hold up in court. I was trying not to listen to closely to avoid boiling my blood.
We got ourselves ready and headed over to the east end for the Handmade Arcade.
Holy WOW. It was SO PACKED! There was lots of great stuff, and so nice to see a bunch of my friends selling their wares. I got a couple of early gifties and chatted with some friends and had a hot dog, but mostly I just suffered from agoraphobia and really couldn't concentrate. I hope everyone had a great day!
After we left we walked back to rebby's place in the rain and had a little nap on the couch with the kitty until she had to go to work. She dropped me off in Shadyside so I could go to the swedenkaffe in search of salty licorice fish. Of course it was pouring down rain by this point, and I had only a knit hat and scarf and my thin cardigan to protect me from the elements. I arrived at the Swedenkaffe just in time to see the proprietor go to walk her dog, so I wandered around a bit to kill some time. I checked out Williams Sonoma and then went to Kawaii gifts, where I have NEVER been before. Seriously! What's wrong with me! It's an awesome little shop. I got some more early gifties and a mexican cocoa candle and the cutest tiny little stickers! they have a wonderland of stuff with my all time favorite little japanese character...the burnt toast head guy! In addition to all the standard hello kitty and friends stuff. Finally I wandered back to the Swede shop and saw the salty licorice fish the minute I walked in the door. I swooned! Had a nice conversation with the lady...I think I must have given her the impression that I was Swedish without really meaning to, but I would have felt weird blurting out "I'm not really Swedish" so I didn't say anything. I will be going back for more fish though...hers are really fresh because she gets them sent over direct from relatives. Yum!
I walked to the grocery store in the drizzle to get fruit for brunch tomorrow and some stuff to have around the house. I made myself a delicious germanic dinner of egg noodles with brussels sprouts, onion, pork and bread crumbs. And I added some cottage cheese in there too. I can't believe how fresh and delicious these brussels sprouts still are after being in my fridge for almost three weeks...but then again, they are from my pirate farmboy secret lover, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.
Whew! That was long! I think it might be bedtime!

A PEPPERMINT WIND IS BLOWING THROUGH WASHINGTON!

I really wish I could remember exactly when Alan uttered that quote...I think it might have been when we went to the Pro Choice march waaaaaaaay back in the late 80s, or it might have been when we stumbled (literally) upon a Jesse Jackson rally in Albuquerque.
Whenever it was, it's one of my favorite phrases whenever something good happens in politics. Which hasn't really been all that often for the past, oh, 6 years, but
TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's a great day to be a Democrat. Especially a democrat from Pennsylvania.
Party on, Garth.

Hope you are enjoying the tour through my tortured love poetry. These poems date mostly from 1999-2001, a period during which I was coping with the end of my marriage with a wide array of unhealthy behaviors. Including falling in love with all sorts of inappropriate and unattainable people. I think some of the poetry is pretty good, though. There's some other stuff I might post eventually that goes a little farther back as well....I wish I had been obsessed enough with my own creative output to date these things because I have to try to retro fit them with context clues now. Anyhow, comments are welcome and appreciated.

I just got back from a visit to my lovely pirate farmboy secret lover. He was "in charge" today as his father did not make the run and the other fellow working with him was brand new. People are not at all orderly at the farmer's market, but I was perfectly content to stand there and patiently wait my turn. The longer to watch him unload giant sacks of corn from the back of the truck, and carefully bag tomatoes so they wouldn't bruise, and be kind and patient with old women and non english speaking men. I got some garlic, onions, big gorgeous red tomatoes, and some more of that incredible spinach I've been eating all week. I still have half the bag from last week left, but it is holding up really well and I am envisioning a giant pile of steamed spinach with butter for supper one night this week. I am such a fool for not doing this all summer! Just two more weeks. But then, I have found through the magic of the internet that his farm actually has a year round market in Valencia, PA. Sigh. That will definitely have to be our next weekend farm destination. Though I fessed up to rebby about my secret pirate farmboy lover and she is jealous. More because she wants to be a farmer than anything else, I think.

Rollergirl

that girl
cuts me right clear through
with her foxy lady
and her blue knee socks

and then she says
i was just talking about you
and then i say
what did you say
and then she says
i wish you loved me
and then i say
i do......
and i do

there's a place where we could meet
over wine and rabbit stew and dire straits
and i have that old familiar feeling
i want you and i want you and i want you
but i want to protect you
from people like me.

Pomegranate

I bring you fruit
from another world.
I tell you every seed
is another year in Hell.
You're not afraid
you tell me
You'll get a bowl
You'll get a knife
You tell me
You're not afraid.

You sit across from me
There's no one else in the room
In the house on the street
In the world.

The world is you and me
And the bowl and the knife
And the fruit.
You're not afraid
You tell me
You want to do it
You tell me
Show me how
You tell me
You're not afraid.

I cut it open
I show you how
to take the juice
But leave the seed.

You're not afraid
You tell me
You like the sweet
You like the sticky
You're not afraid.

Our fingers sticky
The juice no redder
Than your lips
You're not afraid
You're not afraid
You're not afraid.

But I am.

Sped up Backtracking

I am gonna crank up the speed a little bit and sacrifice detail...but really, if it's taken me a week there probably isn't that much to say, right?
So, Sunday--I tried to sleep in, but only ended up sleeping till 9am. At least, I thought it was 9am, but then when I turned on the computer it was only 8am because of the time change. Le sigh. I puttered around a bit and then went in to work, where it was slammin busy. I caught the wave and put it into high gear....got tons of prep done. Tons. And then the show started, and there was this "comedian" who was hosting the show (only not at all, really just doing his "comedy" in between acts) and I was APPALLED. Really, I didn't know people still did that Andrew Dice Clay style stuff anymore. I heckled him from the kitchen, apparently echoing throughout the place. Ha! Well, he made an offensive Yoko joke. He so deserved it.
Saturday---the wedding. Really, I would say it went off with very few hitches. We hadn't planned the beverage situation too well, and we ran out of corn early, and the last batch of mashed potatoes took a little extra time to heat, but otherwise it was really painless. Having the HBIC (head bitches in charge) team together I think really did it. We were able to just get it all done make the family really happy which is a large part of the battle. I was tired and sore at the end of it, but not nearly as drained as I often am after these sorts of events. The hardest part, I think, was the couple hours before we actually left when I was obsessively checking my lists and repacking everything. And the bizarre weather which changed from sunny and bright to giant hailballs coming out of the sky in the half hour before we left. Luckily, we decided to load the cars before Jilly and Leslie went to shower, so we didn't have to load in the hail. Unluckily, by the time we got there, the weather had turned nasty again. But it could have been much, much worse.
Friday---the show. It was weird. I don't really know what else to say. Belvederes is a place with a lot of potential, but the night was bizarre and I was really glad to have my sunglasses. Colin and Amy were fantastic, and The Cro Flies Trio was fun. People were drunk and dressed up. I guess it could have been much worse too. The best compliment of the night was when Sam came up and said that Colin and I have developed some great rhythmic telepathy. That was cool.

OK! Now I'm caught up. Yesterday I cleaned and did laundry all day. I dug through a bunch of boxes in the corner of doom and found some old journals and poetry. Details to follow. Then rebby and I decided to go to Damons for steaks...only when we drove out to McKnight, that Damons had closed also. That's two down. We kept on driving as she remembered a Lonestar out there somewhere, but that seemed to be gone too. We ended up at Elephant and Castle, which was damned yummy. I had the steak and chips with baked beans, she had the yorkshire pudding stuffed with roast beef and onions. It came with yummy mashers and green beans. The Guiness was nice and warm. It was a really good meal even though I hated the fact that I was in the North Hills. I just don't like it out there.

Well, my body has completely adapted to the new clock. I went to bed at 9:30 last night and woke up fresh as a daisy at 6:30am. And it was already getting light outside. Dang, I should totally be working on a farm!
Which brings me nicely back to my Monday. Monday morning Rebby and I went to Barb's Country Kitchen for breakfast, being very nostalgic for the country style breakfast with gravy over everything. I hate to say it, but it was a bad move. It seems that since they've opened the back room or whatever, the breakfast has gone downhill. The gravy was definitely out of a can and tasted like chemicals. The bacon was kinda gross. Boo. It wasn't the worst biscuits and gravy I've ever had (that honor is still held by the restaurant in the tiny airport in Zainsville OH) but it was pretty bad. Of course, I am a snob---rebby said it tasted fine to her. Oh well.
After the unsatisfying breakfast, I went on my maiden voyage to Trader Joes. I took a couple of bags, my backpack, and $100. I was ready.
Thankfully it wasn't insanely crowded---I was still jostled several times by people with more money than me, but nothing like the horror stories I had heard about the grand opening weekend. I tried to look carefully at everything on offer...there were a couple of sections I wasn't able to get very close to, and I wasn't willing to hang around all day to check them out. My overall impression is---the dried fruit and nuts section is awesome. I got some dried mango and freeze dried strawberries which I used to make that stellar granola yesterday. I picked up a tiny round of dubliner irish cheddar that was so cute I couldn't resist, and a tub of fresh mozzarella medallions that are very good and were pretty cheap. The cheese deals seem pretty good overall, but there's always the strip. I think that TJs really excels in frozen pre-prepared stuff, and well....I'm trying to get away from that. I did buy some frozen organic sugar snap peas, which are delicious. But, they were grown in CHINA. Why am I eating vegetables grown in china? That just doesn't seem right to me. (foreshadowing) I got some pretty good candy, and some really good multigrain bread, and some delicious organic ground beef, and some really yummy natural bacon. But the greatest find for me was New Mexico Pinon Coffee. Oh yes. It was such a thrill to see the red foil bag--it instantly reminded me of christmas in Albuquerque. The first pot I brewed up was like nostalgia in a cup. So good. So I will go back to TJs at least for that, sometimes. Also, I bought some soy creamer to try out for the restaurant and I have to say it is way more delicious than silk soy creamer. So hopefully we will be able to get that by the case from TJs and then we won't have to deal with whether or not Frankferd is going to send Silk this week. (they haven't for the past month or so) I got some antiperspirant and toothpaste also..both fine. In general, there aren't many reasons for me to make the trip, I have to say. But I'm glad it's here. If it takes some pressure off of Whole Foods that would be nice...I'd like to be able to shop at WF again. But I can't while it's like running the gauntlet of privilidged white people.
So after my shopping trip I caught the 77 bus and came home and promptly made myself a little organic lunch. The sugar snap peas were delicious, like I said, but the China thing is too weird. The organic beef burger was super yummy. While I ate I looked at the computer a little bit, and read through a lot of stuff on The Ethicurian, one of my favorite new sites. So there I was, reading about local and sustainable farming while eating vegetables grown in CHINA. It just didn't seem right. So I decided to educate myself at the library! Unfortunately The Omnivore's Dillema was checked out, but I printed out info on a couple of other books at my local branch. And then, I somehow realized that Monday is the day of the East Liberty Farmer's Market!!!!!! What luck!
So I headed down to the library where I got out Coming Home to Eat by Gary Paul Nabhan. I'm having sort of a hard time getting into it, but I'm not giving up. I asked the nice lady at the desk if she could direct me to the farmer's market, which she did.
And then.....I fell in love.
I walked in to the parking lot next to the McDonalds (ha!) and there were TONS of farmers with their wares. Fresh local vegetables, organic eggs and meats, jams and jellies, pies, cider....my god. I wandered around in a daze for a while, checking out all the offerings. Then I started to collect. Cider, beautiful little garnet yams, organic lettuces, and then I went to the stand at the far end, where I really fell in love with this tall strapping farm boy. He had long blonde hair with little pirate braids in it. Oh my. He lovingly wrapped my fresh beets with tops, brussels sprouts, and SPINACH. I lovingly handed over my $8.00. Swoony swoon swoon.
Why OH Why have I not been going to the farmer's market all summer long?!?!? I am a fool. I have three more weeks to go. But I only have three more days to eat the rest of the produce in my fridge before Monday!
I think I'll make a big vegetable dinner tonight for rebby and me before we go out to the brillobox to see the random bullshit show. Monday night I had a great dinner of steamed spinach, rice and beans, and yams roasted with tamarind sauce. I need to eat like that all the time. It all comes down to the dishes, really. If I can train myself to do the dishes immediately I'll be happy to cook vegetables every night of the week. Pray for me.
Next up: Sunday night with the offensive comedian, Saturday WEDDING, Friday SHOW!

Ok, let's do this.
Wow, so much to recap...I'm gonna go backwards, and maybe even break it up into a couple entries. It's been a wild ride the last week for sure!
Today---I had kind of a crappy day at work. I was unmotivated and sleepy (more on that later) and then I got taken by surprise with a whole lot of dishes. Bleah. The highlight was definitely the strawberry mango granola I made right before I left. Delish.
Part of the sleepiness came from waking up at 2am in order to get on the computer to listen to Roxie on a different radio station. He's now doing a Thursday morning Hollywood Hookup rock report at Rockklassiker, which is the station where he got to hang out with the drummer and singer from Europe last week. Remember? Anyway, last week he put out a call for some rock gossip, and I did my part by forwarding him a link to a page about rockstar:supernova. Specifically all the trials and tribulations and conspiracy theories. So what do I hear when I finally manage to tune in to this superfast feed that is almost entirely in Swedish? Roxie called Gilby Clarke on air to get the scoop. Ha! Of course, Gilby is a professional and did not dish, but he also didn't manage to convince me that he is all about Lukas. His only comment was about Lukas's HAIR. Hmm. Roxie was super funny and the wacky Swedish morning DJs are a real trip. Also, Roxie used the word "vacillate" correctly in a sentence. At 8am. And you wonder why he's my favorite rock star? Well, besides the Willie Wonka, and the porn.
He sent me an email thanking me for providing him with job security. I guess the Swedes were so impressed that he could call an ex member of Guns and Roses that they have invited him back for the next few weeks. Wonder how many other rock stars he has on speed dial?
Ok...Wednesday. I hauled the computer in to work and paid my $4.95 fee and listened to Roxie on the Rocket while I roasted some green chiles for chile rellenos casserole. It was a good show...didn't get my Hanoi Rocks but he did play "Shake Rattle and Roll" by Bill Haley which my internet friend Michelle decided was for me since it talks about rattling the pots and pans. Hee. He also played a song by a group called the Pipettes out of the UK which was really great. I'm gonna look them up. After the show I did some various prep, a bunch of dishes, and made what I think is a super delicious vegan Mulligatawny soup. When I got home I ended up eating a whole lot of weird foods (well, separately they weren't weird at all, but combined they turned into a bubbling cauldron in my tummy) and made myself sort of sick. I went to bed around 9:30pm so I could wake up in the middle of the night for Roxie.
I'm slavishly devoted, no?
Tuesday...it was Halloween! I really didn't acknowledge it at all other than writing "boo!" on everything I labeled in the kitchen and making a spooky breakfast special that no one ordered. Oh well. After work I came home and changed clothes and then rebby and I went to the Harris Grill for beers and dinner. Only, the Harris Grill was being Mad Mex for Halloween. Seriously! It was kinda funny, and they did a great job(I guess the guys who own the place all used to work at Mad Mex) We still got our Magic Hat #9 drafts, but the menu was all mex-i-fied so instead of a juicy burger I got a steak burrito. It was okay. After dinner we stopped at rebby's place to get a camp pad for the back of the truck so I could ride back there when we picked up Leah to go see SHORTBUS! Yes, we did. I could not even begin to tell you how fantastic this movie was for me. I don't think it would be fantastic for everyone, but for a sentimental queer freak like me, it was beautiful. Justin Bond sings this amazing celebratory song at the end and I was just bawling like a baby. Sooooo good. I can't wait to see it again.
I think that's good for this one. Next one will have my revelatory food day and my kick ass work night and the WEDDING. I gotta take a break.