Good morning! The sun is starting to peek out and I am starting to feel awake, and soresoresore! I decided to take the morning off from yoga today since yesterday was pretty jam packed and strenuous. Or maybe I am just copping out....I can't be sure. When I made that decision I picked up my book and started reading (I figured if I wasn't going to actually DO, I would at least READ) and immediately came to a paragraph about resistance. Yes, I've got tons of it. I've been thinking back over my life to the seemingly 300 or so times I have started to do yoga and quit after just a little while, and the pattern is always the same. Physically I immediately feel better....I feel like I am more flexible and straighter and breathe way easier, not to mention feeling calmer and less likely to get stressed out in general. BUT, there is also the emotional component of facing a challenge and working through it, and my ego has a real hard time with that. Somehow I go into yoga expecting to just bend into a pretzel immediately after years and years of bad habits. And when I CANT do that, I get huffy and give up. I feel like I have made a commitment this time and reading this book which actually acknowledges these feelings (most yoga books seem to come from the approach that you are an already enlightened being and that doing yoga is a thrilling and completely conflict-free part of your life) helps a lot. Tomorrow is another day, and another chance to get past a couple of sun salutations.
I started my day early with a couple rounds yesterday, and I got a lot farther than the day before. Just in one day! So that was encouraging. After yoga I showered up and headed in for brunch. It was so nice to walk into the place and have it be CLEAN, after two days last week when the cleaner didn't show up. That's just the most depressing thing ever, to walk into the restaurant with last night's garbage still in the can. Bleah. Brunch was steady and we seemed to fly through the food! It was intense. Good though...I was working with someone who has a lot of equanimity so we didn't stress out. We just DID it. And the front of house brunch girls are such a good team that it felt very effortless. After brunch I stuck around to do a bunch of prep and try to calm the spazboy who had the next shift. I was observing his habits and work style and kept trying to give him very subtle little hints to help make things go a little more smoothly....he is very prone to self sabotage. Plus, he really creates a very psychically cluttered space...not just the "stuff" that's all around him, but also lots of dissonant noise. I could not work in that kind of space. But we all have our own ways, I guess, and some people thrive on the nervous energy.
Walked home and relaxed a little bit, and then made my Sunday night after brunch walk to Whole Foods. My favorite German mineral water was on sale..hooray! I also got some fruit and some lovely dark red kale, and my favorite summer bread and coffee and the makings of tomato basil mozzarella salad. Stocked up on near east couscous boxes...my favorite thing. Got one nice pretty piece of salmon, but by the time I got home I didn't really feel like eating it. So that will be tonight. I was going to get myself a treat of Out of a Flower Ice Cream but they only had raspberry and pink grapefruit tarragon, and neither of them appealed to me. So I got a Wah! Guru Chew instead. Yummy. I tried not to go into sticker shock when the nice boy was done ringing me up. I basically spent my whole brunch pay, but if having this nice stuff around makes me happy to cook instead of going out, it's worth the price. The walk home was very lovely, just starting to get dark and a little bit windy. I got home and put on Al Stewart and made my tomato basil mozzarella salad and then had some couscous with vegetables and chicken garlic sausage with it. Oh so good. I ended up getting sucked into the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie about the kid who has mentally ill parents and runs away to live with his favorite aunt who is trying to write a novel and get it on with her writing mentor(played with the most awful Irish accent I have ever heard. Reminded me of Keanu Reeves in Dracula. It was that bad) There was a subplot about this group of goth punk kids that the boy gets involved with, but I missed the beginning so it didn't make a whole lot of sense. I don't know if seeing it from the beginning would have helped or not. A lot of the acting was really terrible, but Marcia Gay Harden and the kid were good. The Hallmark commercials were so over the top that when they came on I would run from the room to change the sheets or put something away. Anything to get away from the deliberate heart string tugging of those commercials. The way the camera lovingly lingers on the hallmark stamp on the envelopes really turned my stomach. Ewww.
It's my second to last week at the bookstore, and I couldn't be happier. Having Mondays and Tuesdays off is going to RULE! I think we are into buyback now, so going to work these two weeks isn't going to be so bad. There will be stuff to do. Thank heavens.
I started my day early with a couple rounds yesterday, and I got a lot farther than the day before. Just in one day! So that was encouraging. After yoga I showered up and headed in for brunch. It was so nice to walk into the place and have it be CLEAN, after two days last week when the cleaner didn't show up. That's just the most depressing thing ever, to walk into the restaurant with last night's garbage still in the can. Bleah. Brunch was steady and we seemed to fly through the food! It was intense. Good though...I was working with someone who has a lot of equanimity so we didn't stress out. We just DID it. And the front of house brunch girls are such a good team that it felt very effortless. After brunch I stuck around to do a bunch of prep and try to calm the spazboy who had the next shift. I was observing his habits and work style and kept trying to give him very subtle little hints to help make things go a little more smoothly....he is very prone to self sabotage. Plus, he really creates a very psychically cluttered space...not just the "stuff" that's all around him, but also lots of dissonant noise. I could not work in that kind of space. But we all have our own ways, I guess, and some people thrive on the nervous energy.
Walked home and relaxed a little bit, and then made my Sunday night after brunch walk to Whole Foods. My favorite German mineral water was on sale..hooray! I also got some fruit and some lovely dark red kale, and my favorite summer bread and coffee and the makings of tomato basil mozzarella salad. Stocked up on near east couscous boxes...my favorite thing. Got one nice pretty piece of salmon, but by the time I got home I didn't really feel like eating it. So that will be tonight. I was going to get myself a treat of Out of a Flower Ice Cream but they only had raspberry and pink grapefruit tarragon, and neither of them appealed to me. So I got a Wah! Guru Chew instead. Yummy. I tried not to go into sticker shock when the nice boy was done ringing me up. I basically spent my whole brunch pay, but if having this nice stuff around makes me happy to cook instead of going out, it's worth the price. The walk home was very lovely, just starting to get dark and a little bit windy. I got home and put on Al Stewart and made my tomato basil mozzarella salad and then had some couscous with vegetables and chicken garlic sausage with it. Oh so good. I ended up getting sucked into the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie about the kid who has mentally ill parents and runs away to live with his favorite aunt who is trying to write a novel and get it on with her writing mentor(played with the most awful Irish accent I have ever heard. Reminded me of Keanu Reeves in Dracula. It was that bad) There was a subplot about this group of goth punk kids that the boy gets involved with, but I missed the beginning so it didn't make a whole lot of sense. I don't know if seeing it from the beginning would have helped or not. A lot of the acting was really terrible, but Marcia Gay Harden and the kid were good. The Hallmark commercials were so over the top that when they came on I would run from the room to change the sheets or put something away. Anything to get away from the deliberate heart string tugging of those commercials. The way the camera lovingly lingers on the hallmark stamp on the envelopes really turned my stomach. Ewww.
It's my second to last week at the bookstore, and I couldn't be happier. Having Mondays and Tuesdays off is going to RULE! I think we are into buyback now, so going to work these two weeks isn't going to be so bad. There will be stuff to do. Thank heavens.
posted by sheryl at 8:50 AM
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